Prove you Right

Ego check: Proving someone wrong can be an exciting exercise 🙂 especially when you know they got you so wrong. Just make sure you’re not over consumed in this task 😅. Stick to your path, sometimes proving the naysayers wrong will come naturally as a byproduct of this…

 

Sometimes you have to accept that you may never get the chance to prove a certain person wrong.

Be okay with this. You are living and and growing for you and no one else ~

J.Idara

#beyouforyou #happygoals #integral #justbeyou #dream #believe #aspire #achieve #idarathedreamer

See Your Good

We learn a lot about ourselves through external feedback from the people we encounter throughout our entire lives. We are subtly reminded of our good and not so good qualities and made aware of what people love about us and the the things they are not so keen on about our character.

The people most likely to notice our best and worst qualities are the people who we have the closest relationships with. Sometimes this is a good thing; if you have mutual trust and respect and the criticism they offer comes from a place of love and empathy, they can help you to become a better person and vice versa.

However, sometimes the closest to us can offer comments, advice or criticism that doesn’t stem from a place of love. It may be harsh, insensitive, unloving, or even abusive. It is key to develop a personal understanding of what your good qualities are outside of just what people tell you about yourself.

You can get this from the feedback you draw from others who truly care about you; Don’t just take note of  what they say directly to you, but also of how they describe you to others, how people react to the things you do, how they show they feel about you. If you believe it is true and in love or appreciation of you, then take it in. You may also find helpful taking in feedback from how strangers react to your good traits too, sometimes it is people who you may feel know the least about you, that can notice good things about you that those closest to you may overlook.

The most important way to see your good is by taking note of the things YOU believe are good about yourself and understanding the things that make YOU feel happy about yourself.

If you have ever been in a relationship that had more negatives than positives or one that your partner, friend or family member did not offer much positive comments or appreciation of you, when such relationship ends, it may be difficult to separate any of the good things they said about you from this. This can sometimes put us off those good qualities of ourselves, because we wrongfully believe that this is what attracted the wrong type of person to us. 

Just remember, your good and bad qualities are independent from anyone else. We should know, people who are bad for us (just like those who are good for us) are still capable of noticing good things in us. Even if we want to work on removing our bad qualities and becoming better, this can only happen if we continue to see our good. The more we learn to love the good things about ourselves, the more in future we open ourselves up to the right person or people also appreciating those good things about us. 

 

J. Idara

 

 

Happy New Decade

Happy New Year and Decade to you and all your loved ones.

A lot of us have found ourselves reminiscing about the previous decade. The people, places and experiences we have encountered, things we have accomplished, but also the tough times, the loved ones we have lost,  the challenges and things we would have liked to have done better.

 

Embrace all of this and take all the lessons into this new decade. Think of the things you know now that would have been achieved if you let go of fear. Think of the things you want to do now and how you want to feel about your future self, in another decades time. One of the biggest lessons most of us have learned looking back, is that the small consistent commitments we make every day really do go a long way to achieving our goals and aspirations in the long run. It is hard to stay consistent, but moments like these remind us of how rewarding it can be when we commit and stick to task.

 

 

So, my advice (including to myself) is to take it a day at a time. Work on the little things, work on building good habits. Work on finding more ways to have fun, explore and enjoy a more fulfilling life. Take more risks in spite of fear. You will thank yourself in a year, or maybe even 10 years time.

 

Have a lovely New Year.

J. IDARA